Unfortunately school has started again.  It still feels like summer to me.  Actually, it feels more like summer now than it did in July.  Thus... no motivation to study for my classes.  Well, not just no motivation but a feeling of apathy towards school in general.  That really scares me.  However, I'm really happier these days than I have been for a long time.  Perhaps I feel more at peace with who I am. 

Plans for the weekend.  Hehe... this'll be fun.  I'm actually going to the beach!!!!  Woo-hoo!!!!  This time I'll wear sunscreen.  No more burning for Chen.  Also.... having a suite dinner tomorrow.  Awww... it will bring back so many memories (sniff, sniff).  It'll be cool to see some people I haven't seen in a long time though.  Then I'll need to get studying done.  No class for me on Monday though.  Hehe... I only have Chem. lab on Mondays and that was canceled for the week.

Hm... since I haven't updated for a while, I guess I'll write about what happened last week.  Well, aside from school, last weekend I went with Javy back to his hometown.  That was quite fun.  Thought Oxnard would be in the middle of a desert (doesn't it sound like it should be) but it ended up being along the coast.  So we went to the beach, the movies, Disneyland, and did some other stuff.  I wish we didn't have to come back to Berkeley.  Berkeley is just such a different feel.  Everything feels so rushed in Berkeley.  Right now I feel like I need to be in a calmer environment.  Somewhere less frantic.  With no homework to be stresseda about.  I think working over the summer tired me out for the schoolyear.  Sigh...  Otherwise, I've been trying to decide whether or not I should drop a class.  I'm thinking of dropping my Geo. class since I just won't have that much time to do all the reading.  But then, I'd just be left with 13 units and that would leave me feeling very guilty.  That's the minimum number of units allowed!!!!  Don't know if I could do it. 

It's was really discouraging when I walked on a scale to find that I am 96.8 pounds.  That means I've lost around 3 pounds this summer.  This also means that I will have to gain 10 pounds in the next 3 years.  Wonderful.  I don't know if I can get myself to do that.  It's kinda scary.  10 POUNDS!!!!!  I'll no longer be considered skinny (haha).

After much consideration, I've finally decided on a schedule for next sem.  It's not as great as I had expected it to be, but oh well.  I unfortunately end later than I would like.  Anyways, I'll be taking chem 3a, physics 8b, history 13a (early chinese history), and slavic 50 (to fulfill the damn International Studies breadth).  And this is final.  No more changes.

My goals for next semester: concentrate harder on schoolwork, work out (what is this running thing?), eat healthy (maybe have 2 meals instead of one... or maybe even 3 meals!!!), get a job, EMT training, volunteer.  I actually feel motivated to accomplish these goals, so we'll see if it works out.

Ahhh... I think I'm going crazy, but I'm considering training to become and EMT.  It would be a great experience for me I think.  That means, next semester I'll have to be trained in Standard First Aid and CPR and then spring semester I'll be taking a class to prepare me as an EMT.  I'm also thinking of volunteering either at the Oakland Children's Hospital or the San Francisco General Hospital.  However, if I'm stuck with a clerical job, I'm not going to do it.  I want to be a volunteer in the ER.  Such exciting things for me to consider.

I've been really tired for the last 2 days.  I don't even know why.  It's really aweful though.  I can't concentrate at work and keep on screwing up.  Only 2 weeks of work left though.  I'll be thankful that it's over.  Not that I've decided I don't want to do grad school, I'm probably not going to work in a lab again.  For some reason, I feel like I'm cramped in a box when I'm in the lab.

Finally I feel like I'm accomplishing something at work.  I definitely work better by myself.  Then I can design my own experiments and plan out my days (haha... not bored as often anymore).  And... I'm left with quite a satisfactory feeling at the end of the day.  All is good then.

It's getting to be increasingly hard for me to get up in the morning.  I get up later and later...  This going to bed at 2 am is catching up to me.  Now that I think about it... I'm not even quite sure how the time flies by when I'm back in my apartment.  That's definitely a disturbing thought.

I've decided that I want to double in history and mcb again.  Haha... this is after deciding on an mcb and public health double major just 2 weeks ago and countless other combinations last year.  Since I started off with history and mcb, I think I'll just stick with it.  I find history really interesting (thinking of emphasizing on Chinese history), hehe... but we'll see when I have all that reading to do.  So... thus far, next sem. scheduler looks like this: chem. 3a, physics 8b, history 13a, and psych 1.  Hm... i think i'll be pretty busy.

I've been telling myself that I want to learn Chinese again for the longest time, and now I think I'm actually going to do something about it.  Mostly, I'll just start off by memorizing vocab.  This means that I should go buy some books to aid me in my studying.  I'm hoping that maybe I'll be able to learn enough Chinese to study abroad there one semester.  I would love to study abroad, but it'd be so hard to fit into my schedule.  But I just want to learn Chinese in general anyways.